I continued with life as normal, even with the shocking news of my most recent pregnancy. I didn’t know how it was possible, we had never not used protection, not even one time! I was scared, alone and pregnant, it was like a recurring nightmare.
I knew it wouldn’t be so terrible, because I had gotten Willow out of the first one but if River came back again then left I just don’t know if I could take it.
My belly wasn’t popped yet, but you could definitely see it wasn’t my normal belly. There was no going back on this and I tried to look at it positively, thinking of what a wonderful daughter I had and that I would be getting another amazing child out of this.
It was hard either way and I spent a lot of time with the cats, pouring out all my troubles to them.
I spent a lot of time with Willow as well, she was literally my only friend in the world, well other then the cats of course.
She was really starting to develop her own little personality, it was so cool to see her growing up. I know all parents say this, but literally yesterday I was cuddling her in my arms as a newborn. I couldn’t believe how fast time had gone and because I had her so young, I was still in the early stages of being a young adult. I had my whole life ahead of me and maybe once she graduated from school I would start to live it.
I was getting huge, I felt like a hipo most of the time waddling around the house. I couldn’t wait to get this baby out already, so I could meet it. I was so tired of being pregnant, it wasn’t a happy thing for me.
Willow was lately very fascinated by my ever growing belly and would poke at it with her tiny fingers, probably wondering what was making it so big.
I got my wish and soon went into my second labor, alone.
It was a very rough labor and delivery this time, because I couldn’t go to the hospital. I didn’t want to have to bring Willow with me and leave her with child services. I was proud of myself for having this baby all by myself, she was beautiful.
I named her Pocahontas and she weighed 7 pounds and 3 ounces.
It was just before Willow’s birthday, I was so excited for her. She was walking, talking and completely able to use the potty on her own, I was very proud of my girl.
When I was shutting off the lights in the house one night I happened to glance out the window and see dad standing there with an umbrella over his head. He wasn’t close to the door, but he also wasn’t close enough to the window to see in. It was like he couldn’t decided whether or not he wanted to be here.
I figured I would decide for him and timidly stepped outside and walked toward him.
“Daddy?” I asked as I got closer to him, it was so good to see a familiar face. I had missed my father so much, the relief of finally seeing him again flooded to me all at once. I ran to him and tried to throw my arms around him, but he awkwardly pushed me away and stepped back.
“No Nala, I’m not really comfortable with that.” He said, this man did not sound like my father at all. This was the same man who cried when I left home.
“What is it dad?” I asked, not really sure what to do.
“I heard what happened.” Dad said roughly, not making eye contact with me.
“I meant to tell you all, I really did, but I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want you to hate me for the rest of my life, I’m so sorry. Do you want to me-” Before I could finish asking dad if he wanted to meet his grand daughters he cut me off.
“So it’s true then, you’ve been living with River?” Dad asked, still not looking at my face.
“Well, yes, but you have to let me explain.” I said, trying to defend myself.
“There’s nothing to explain here, Nala, I’m sorry to see that this is the path you have chosen. I will always love you and I will always miss you, but I can not be a part of your life.” With that, dad walked away from me.
“Daddy, please!” I called out to him, but he did not turn around and open his arms to me in a hug. My father had disowned me and I hadn’t even been able to tell him about his grand daughters.
I took extra good care of my girls that night, giving each of them a few extra kisses. I would never do something like what my father had just done to me to either of my girls. I would never be able to just never want to see them again, no matter what they did.
Willow was growing up on me again, but she was turning into such a wonderful young lady I was okay with it. She could always be found with a book in her hand, now that she was old enough to read.
She also tried her hand out on my easel and it turns out she’s quite good at it, it is in her DNA!
While Willow was learning new things at her new age her little sister Pocahontas was also learning her fair share of new things. She always wore a sour face while I had her sitting on the potty and it took her forever to realize she was supposed to do something other then just sit there.
Sparrow and Soleil loved each other and could usually be found together. I was so glad I had adopted Soleil to keep Sparrow company, they made a very good match.
Willow was usually the third musketeer with the cats, she loved to play with them and I was glad she had some great play mates.
It was hard being a single mother, there were many times when I would wake up in the middle of the night to a screaming baby. Pocahontas was teething and would sometimes just wake up in pain and scream for me, I felt so bad for her but it was also really hard to be woken at all hours of the night.
I would comfort her and cuddle her until she was feeling better and getting sleepy again. I knew I was very blessed to have my two gorgeous girls, but it was a lot of work for one person. If River ever did come back I would make sure to tell him about all of this and have him pay me back.
DisneyDreams 