Dad was completely torn apart and heart broken beyond consoling. I felt so bad for him, he was so in love with my mother and now they would never grow old and see grand children together.
I missed mom too, but it was nothing compared to what my father was going through.
Cimba was becoming obsessed with his English teacher, Miss Hartley, I think he might have even been in love with her. It was cute that my brother liked her so much, he was always finding an excuse to invite her over. I wondered if there was anything romantic actually going on with the pair, Miss Hartley was pretty young and seemed to genuinely really like my brother. I hoped he would be careful and she wouldn’t break his heart, I knew what a broken heart felt like and I didn’t want anyone to have to go through this kind of pain.
The past month had really made me grow up, yes I was older on the outside but I was also older on the inside. I was sad, beyond sad, I didn’t know how to handle what had happened. I knew it had to have been an accident and I still loved River, I just wanted to find him so I could tell him. If I felt this way he had to still love me, right?
I had to find River, I just wanted to be with him, to love him how we always wanted.
“No, that’s not possible!” I yelled into the phone, not able to believe my ears.
“Yes, miss, there’s no mistake our system is full proof.” The doctor on the other end of the phone told me.
“Seriously, you can’t be telling me that’s true! What can I do to stop it, there must be a way to stop it!” I said, kind of starting to freak out at the doctor.
“Nala, you can get it aborted don’t worry. Please just calm down a little bit, I know this is a shock for you.”
“I-isn’t that killing it?” I asked, my voice starting to shake a little bit. I hung up before I could hear the answer, I knew that would be killing it. There was nothing I could do, this was happening to me whether I liked it or not.
I ran to my bed and threw myself on to it, my chest heaving as the heavy sobs started. I couldn’t believe this was possible, I don’t even want to write the words right now. If I write the words, they will be true. The doctor told me I’m pregnant, the only guy I’ve ever been with is River so it’s his baby. He was completely gone and n one had seen or heard from him, how was I supposed to have his baby without him even being here?
It wasn’t like I could even tell my family, I mean oh yeah hey guys you know the guy that probably killed mom yeah well I’m having his baby. I could definitely see that one going over really well.
That was it, I had decided I had to move out. I would move out and I would start a life all by myself, even though I did want to be with my family, I knew that if I was with them they’d want to get rid of my baby and probably hate me. I couldn’t put them through that, I didn’t know what I was doing but I knew I couldn’t involve my family in it. I would raise this baby myself in a small house somewhere no ne would find us.
The first person I said goodbye to was my baby sister, Sarabi.
“I love you Sarabi, be a good girl and listen to what dad tells you to do. I’ll always be here if you need me, I’m always a phone call away, okay?” I told her, pulling her into a big hug.
“Cimba, I’m moving out now I know you want to go soon too, but please take care of dad while you’re here. I’m worried about him and I know you guys are close, I just don’t know how he’s going to take me moving out.”
“Don’t worry, Nala, we’ll be fine. Go enjoy life have some fun, be an adult.” He smiled reassuring me about it, I could always count on my brother no matter what he was a great guy.
My dad was the last person to say goodbye to, I had such a soft spot in my heart for him. Daddy had really gone through a lot in his life and I was sad to be leaving him but I knew I had no other choice. I could not even consider telling my dad about the baby, he would never be able to accept it.
“Daddy I’m leaving now, I’m moving out. I can’t stay anymore, I’m ready to start a life of my own now.”
“Okay, if that’s what you really want. There’s plenty of room here and it’s no trouble having you here. You can stay, Nala, I’ll back off a little more if that’s what you need, I’m sorry.”
“No dad, that’s not it at all, I just really want to experience living on my own.”
As I turned to go I heard dad start crying, I couldn’t take hearing that and immediately turned back.
“Daddy, it’s okay, I’m still here I’m not going to disappear.”
I pulled dad into a hug, I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to stay so badly, but I couldn’t unless I was ready to tell him about the baby.
Dad gave me some money to get started, I purchased a small lot up on a hill surrounded by trees without any neighbors. It was small, but it was great. I wasn’t really excited to start here I already missed my family, but I had gotten myself into this mess and I would have to take the consequences.
Dad even bought me a reliable car, in case I needed to get anywhere. I told him it was completely unnecessary, of course, but he insisted.
I was filling the new food bowl I had bought, I had decided to adopted a cat. I figured if I was going to be raising a baby soon I would need some practice. It was probably also going to be pretty lonely in this house all by myself, so why not get a cat? Everyone always said cats were easier to care for then dogs so that’s why I decided on a cat.
I was hungry like all the time, even though I was only about two months pregnant. I was going to need to learn how to cook, I had done it a little bit at home but now I’d have to cook all of the meals.
My first cooking experience didn’t really go so well, I burnt the whole bowl of mac n’ cheese. I was completely starve though so I tried to just ignore the burnt taste.
This is my new cat Sparrow, they told me they didn’t know what breed he is but I really think he’s part bengal due to his markings and coloring. He’s adorable and makes me feel like I’m not so alone out here in this house.
I would often wake up in the middle of the night very sick to my stomach and most of the time I would end up on the bathroom floor, throwing up all night.
I would try and wash everything off in the shower, but all I could think about was River and how he should be here right now. I needed him, I needed to find him but I had no idea where to start.
DisneyDreams 